Have you heard this expression, ” you’re so extra!” ?
Extra?
The first time I heard that, I didn’t know if it was meant as an insult or a compliment! In reality, they were speaking of someone else, so I stopped to candidly consider (also known as eavesdropping) what, or whom they were referring to.
A young woman had just walked into the restaurant where we were waiting for our table. As she gave her name to the hostess, who confirmed her reservation, you could barely take your eyes away. She had walked in confidently, carrying herself well, spoke politely and directly, leaving the observer certain of her “status” in society.
I wondered what that status may in fact, be.
Was she a young mother, working from home while transporting toddlers back and forth from preschool? Was she a CEO, CFO, or owner of her own company?
In my opinion, that is what “extra” should mean.
Extra is more; more than you asked for, giving above and beyond what is required or expected, this is what she was “perceived” as being, simply because of her air of confidence.
So, in order to go a bit deeper, I actually looked up the Webster’s meaning of ” a confident air,” and it states,
An air of confidence is an attitude or state of mind that conveys a sense of self-assurance and composure, even in the face of adversity.
A second source stated, it’s not about “bluffing or putting up a false front” but about truly believing in yourself and your abilities.
So, I’m wondering, how do you think you’re perceived when you walk into a room?
Does it matter to you?
If so, why,
or if it doesn’t, why not?
I know you’ve seen these women, of all ages, who hold their heads high and almost glide into a room, it just seems effortless.
You’ve seen her, right?
Or are YOU the woman I’m speaking of?
Rest assured, I am not, though I’m not a total flop in a crowded room. I for one, know myself, I’m sure you do as well.
I know my strengths and my weaknesses, though I don’t mind hiding the weak, choosing instead to focus on the good. We do that for others, and why wouldn’t we choose to do that for ourselves?
How about you?
What are your best qualities?
Do you know?
Sometimes it’s hard, actually it can be very hard, to judge your own strengths, but it’s harder still to look at those weaknesses. I do believe a confident woman carries both with her at all times, she doesn’t try to “out run” the negative or to fool others into believing something that she knows she can’t “do or be.” This isn’t deceit, rather an honest assessment of who she is, who you are, and who I am as well.
It’s an acceptance of “self”.
I remember my mother used to give me a stack of books to carry on my head, as I walked with “good posture” around the room. Yes, really! She called it a game, though I knew it was a lesson to become “a lady,” which was very important to her.
Here’s the catch, my brothers’ “good posture” was never an issue or a concern in our home….what the what???
My mother was tall and slim, with the tiniest waist, and wouldn’t think of leaving the house without her Coral lipstick.
She would love this young ladies’ wide brimmed hat with the floral lining, and her bright lipstick, because I’m sure we can all agree, that even if we don’t feel like we’re gliding into the room, we can at least LOOK GOOD!
Here’s to our sisters one and all…
Glide into the room, hold your head high, and BE the extra!
xx,
