What kind of hostess are you? and, do others agree with you?
I ask this only because as a hostess, I’ve felt “pretty good” about myself, until we bought a small cottage on the lake. I’ve hosted many dinners for family and guests, holiday celebrations, large graduation parties (when did that become a “given”!!), and you-name-it everything else.
One would think that hosting at a little lake cottage would be obviously “relaxed, and carefree” well, thinking doesn’t make it a reality.
When you live or own on water, and the weather turns hot, you suddenly become very popular with people you’ve known forever and people you don’t know at all. Everyone is seeking a way to cool off and party at the same time, and you are now “THE place” to be and “THE” host of today’s party or the next one coming.
Our first fourth of July celebration was really just “family only”, as in only 22 of us in 878 square feet of living space. Fortunately, God blessed me with brilliant children, who each eagerly brought over-sized tents, air mattresses, coolers and a jumbo floating unicorn to blow up for the kids to play with, plus their four little dogs came to play with ours.
This is my group, my tribe, my people…family. Wet or dry they’re a fun, loving group of crazy, and they’re all mine!
I was ready.
I was prepared.
I was able.
Then I snapped!… in front of all of our new neighbors, their guests and my entire family.
I was horrified and embarrassed by my own behavior.
Here’s what happened at our first fourth…
One week ahead:
deep clean the cottage and windows
trim all plants, pull weeds
touch up interior and exterior paint where needed
do we need a new mattress?
buy extra towels, sheets and blankets, toiletries,
Three days ahead:
plan a three-day menu, include gluten-free options for all meals
make a grocery list
include beverages, add adult fun drinks
Go to Costco:
buy a floating “island”
extra towels, sheets,
bug spray, sunscreen, first aid kit
sparklers, flags, floating toys
Noodles for all!
And friends, it’s those NOODLES that did me in!
We were in day two of complete though organized chaos, and as I gazed proudly out at the bobbing heads in the water, I realized that noodles were floating away, let loose from their swimmers. The older children were casting away the noodle when tired of it, setting it on the water like you would a shelf, without stopping to put them on shore.
The bay was covered with neon noodles drifting downstream, and there were many of them….when I lost it.
“Hey, the noodles!” I shouted, not too loudly but it went unnoticed, then again, “the noodles!”, again with no response from the bobbing heads…then louder with “GET your noodles, they’re getting away…!”,
Finally, at the top of my lungs,
“GET OUT OF THE WATER NOW!!! AND PUT YOUR NOODLES AWAY!!!”
Heads from all directions, both wet and dry, turned to look… the bobbers, the swimmers, the neighbors and their guests, all eyes on me. The lady that lost it. The lady making a big deal about a neon noodle that cost 2.99, a lady that writes about hosting and holidays.
This lady, not so lady-like.
Martha Stewart wouldn’t do that, I’m certain.
On the following Monday, the neighbors’ next door asked me how our first party went…I knew they already knew what had happened, but I said, I snapped, I was so tired…
Graciously, “that happens”…was all she said.
And it hasn’t happened since then, and that was nine years ago, this last July 4th.
Be kind to yourself.
Be gracious to yourself.
Grab a nap when you need a “time out”!
Get back at it, and enjoy your guests, your kiddos, bobbing heads and floating unicorns, this will not last forever, soak up every second friend,
Find the lovely through the chaos,
and enjoy it!
xx,